You’ve been dreaming about getting married since you were a little girl and now, you have an amazing boyfriend who you love and he equally loves you very much. You feel that he could be your future husband, but there’s a problem- your boyfriend doesn’t want to get married, so what should you do?
Being in a relationship where you and your partner don’t want the same things in life sucks because regardless of how much you love each other and how compatible you are, chances of having a future together are always low.
If you are in a relationship where you want to get married but your boyfriend doesn’t, there are a few things that you should do before moving forward with your relationship. Let’s have a look at some of them.
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List of things you should do if boyfriend does not want to get married
Reflect on your feelings and desires
Try to think about what you really want and need from the relationship right now and whether or not you feel fulfilled in the relationship.
Also, try to think about your future needs from the relationship and list them down. Is marriage that high up on the list? What value do you place upon marriage? If your boyfriend suggested that you continue being together for life without ever getting married would you be okay with it?
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Talk to your partner
Once you’ve figured out what you want from the relationship and you’ve decided how important marriage is to you, it’s now time to have a heart-to-heart conversation with your boyfriend.
Having a candid conversation with your boyfriend about marriage can help you understand his point of view about why he doesn’t want to get married and if he is open to compromise.
Try to find out what his reasons are for not wanting to tie the knot with you- is it because he doesn’t think you are the one for him or he just doesn’t want to get married in general? If he doesn’t want to ever get married at all, why is that so? What kind of a future does he have planned? Are you in his future plans? Is he open to compromise or is his mind completely fixed on never getting married?
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Evaluate the future of your relationship
When you get a clear viewpoint of what your boyfriend thinks about marriage, next, you should evaluate the status of your relationship and whether or not you should continue dating.
Do you think you can comfortably handle a relationship where getting married is not in the near or far future?
If you decide to keep seeing each other then well and good, if you don’t think your relationship has a future then it’s best to call it quits as soon as possible.
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Set boundaries
Whether you decide to continue with the relationship or you decide to end things, it’s important to set boundaries with your boyfriend.
If you’ve decided to continue with your relationship, discuss the terms of your relationship with him about how your future together will look like.
If you’ve decided to break up, you could decide to keep some physical distance between each other and cut off your communication for a while to make the healing process easier for both of you.
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Seek guidance and support
Whichever direction you’ll take in the relationship will not be an easy one. Therefore, it’s very important to talk to someone you trust about your relationship- it could be a trusted friend, a parent or guardian if you are close to them, or even a trained professional.
Besides talking to someone, also talk to God about your relationship. Pray because God listens and when you pray, ask for guidance and strength to cope with your decision.
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